Mr. McMahon and his children Stephanie and Shane make their way to the ring to kick off this celebration of 15 years of Monday night Raw! Mr. McMahon tries to get the family photo taken but Hornswaggle runs out just in time to be in the photo. Vince doesn't look happy. Right as the photo is about to be snapped, Triple H comes out and interrupts the festivities. He insists on being part of the "family" portrait as well as some people that should be part of the photo too. Out comes Melina, Sunny (blast from the past!), Mae Young (eww)! Then Triple H calls out those men who were mistaken for women and taken advantage of by Mr. McMahon. Man this night gets funnier and funnier. Then Stephanie tells her Dad that he's got problems and that she is going to embarrass him. She walks right up to Triple H and lays a huge kiss on him. Triple H then says that he'll "see her at home" and Vince walks out all pissed off. At this point I am about to die laughing. Triple H calls out the one man that can make it all better for Hornswaggle who wanted a memorable night with his "family". The Godfather comes out with his HOOOOO train and beautiful women fill the ring. Hornswaggle sure does look happy to be here now!
A huge ladder match is set up for the Intercontinental championship between Jeff Hardy and Carlito. Jeff's got this one in the bag, ladder matches are his specialty! Carlito doesn't even lock up with Jeff but slides outside and grabs a ladder right off the bat. Jeff takes it to the face as Carlito gets a good shot in. Jeff isn't going to stand for that, so he retaliates back against Carlito. This becomes a who can hurt who more match quick and the fight is on! Both men are equally responsive and quick to counter in this match up so far. Jeff takes a huge risk and it doesn't pay off as he tries to get the advantage over Carlito. Suddenly Carlito starts to dominate this match and I can't believe how well he is doing. When did he get so good in these matches? Despite being injured Jeff manages to land a Swanton Bomb on Carlito and begins to set up to climb that ladder to get the belt. Carlito stops him just as he begins to climb up, then gets the back stabber on Jeff. Carlito climbs the ladder and gets one hand on the belt. Jeff scales up the ladder knocking Carlito out of the ring and retains the title! I knew Jeff would win, he always does! Our rainbow haired warrior gives yet another fantastic match!
Todd Grisham is interviewing Shawn Michaels. He was on the very first Monday Night Raw where he defended his intercontinental championship! There is going to be a match tonight, Mr. Kennedy vs Marty Jannetty! This is going to be awesome!
Santino Marella is in the ring with Maria to bitch about the show tonight. He is interrupted by none other than Rob Van Dam. The match gets underway immediately. I'm glad to see RVD back in action that's for sure! I've missed his wrestling style and creativeness in the ring. RVD wins it in less than a minute! Welcome back RVD!
All four original members of Evolution come out to have a few words. Ric Flair, Batista, Triple H and Randy Orton all in one ring! Orton stops short and doesn't go to the ring immediately. He is refusing to come out there to join them because he's the champ! He's above all that now! He reminds the other three members of Evolution what happened the last time he was champ and associated with them. They beat the hell out of him that night. Triple H makes commentary about Orton being a huge pain in the ass. Orton introduces Edge and says he is more proud to be a member of Rated RKO than Evolution. Batista invites Edge to come ringside to talk trash to his face. There is going to be a match tonight Edge, Randy Orton and Umaga vs Ric Flair, Triple H and Batista. The surprises never cease! (it's only 9pm woo hoo!)
This match gets underway with some intensity and pain is going to be felt by all I'm sure! Orton is beating the heck out of Ric Flair and looks to be enjoying it while he does it. Triple H and Batista take care of Edge and Orton but Umaga manhandles the referee and gets the match called due to disqualification. Edge and Orton run away quick and Triple H is left in the ring with Umaga and his two teammates from Evolution. Umaga gets all three members of Evolution's finishing moves and the teammates win it!
Hornswaggle is in a match next against the Punjabi giant, the Great Khali. Will Hornswaggle be able to survive Mr. McMahon's tough love. He will with the help of Hulk Hogan! (The fans are on their feet!) Hogan gets Khali on the mat and he rolls out of the ring. Hogan has the upper hand in this one. Hulk-a-mania is in the house tonight!
Howard Finkel is announcing a 15 man battle royal. Out comes Al Snow, Bart Gunn, Doink the clown, Repo Man, Steve Blackman, Pete Gass, Bob Backlund, Gangrel, Scotty 2 Hotty, Jim, Neidhardt, Sgt. Slaughter, Gillberg, plus three others that came out during the commercial break that I have no clue who they are. (IRS, Flash Funk and the Goon). IRS wins it and the Million Dollar Man comes out Mr. Ted Dibiase. He pays off the IRS man and Ted Dibiase wins the battle royal! I about died laughing here. It just goes to show that everybody has a price and the million dollar man can always match it!
Eric BIschoff is in the ring to make his speech about his time in the WWE. No matter how much things change, they always stay the same! The McMahon's are going to be dependent on Eric Bischoff to reinvent the business year after year, or so he says. Y2J comes out and has a couple of words for him. Bischoff is the one who "fired" Jericho 2 years ago. Jericho tells Bischoff to shut the hell up and tells him he is an ass clown! (classic Jericho). The insults start flying. Jericho threatens to kick Bischoff's ass right here and now. Bischoff gets a face full of Jericho's fist, but Orton runs out to interfere. Jericho counters Orton's interference and gets the walls of Jericho on Orton. Orton taps like a little girl and we get a glimpse of how good Sunday at Armageddon is going to be!
Dusty Rhodes is joining the announcers tonight to watch the match that his son Cody Rhodes is in. Cody Rhodes and Hardcore Holly vs Lance Cade and Trevor Murdock. This match is going to be for the tag team championship! Cody and Lance start this match off in a big way. The match continues in an explosive manner and Hardcore Holly takes it to Trevor Murdock. Rhodes and Holly win it and are the new tag team champs! Sweet! Dusty Rhodes gets into the ring to congratulate his son on his first championship in the WWE.
Jillian Hall is in the ring singing again. Oh lord where is my remote, mute mute mute! Nooooo! We are saved by Trish Stratus! Trish let's Jillian know that her singing sucks. Jillian doesn't take that very well. Lita comes out and there is some tension between Trish and Lita. Lita and Trish take it to Jillian and kick the crap out of her. (Finally!) Lita and Trish hug to show that they are on the same page this time around!
Kane and Lita run into each other backstage. They attempt small talk and it's all very awkward. Ron Simmons comes over to interject his views on it, DAMN!
Mr. Kennedy comes out for his match against Marty Jannetty. This match came about because of Mr. Kennedy's fun at the expense of Shawn Michaels pride last week on Raw. The match gets underway and we'll see who the best man is! Jannetty starts off strong but Mr. Kennedy gets the upper hand early on in this match up. Kennedy works over the legs of Jannetty to weaken the foundation that the former Rocker has. Unfortunately Mr. Kennedy beats Marty for the win. He doesn't stop there he keeps beating on Jannetty and Shawn Michaels comes out and a brawl starts between Michaels and Kennedy. Triple H comes out to help Shawn Michaels. DX is in the house on Monday night Raw!
Mr. McMahon is back in the ring to announce the greatest superstar in Raw history. "And the winner of this prestigious honor is......." Vincent Kennedy McMahon! (what??) out comes Mankind (Mick Foley) to say a few words about that. Vince gets a mouth full of Mr. Socko at the hands of Mankind tonight. Suddenly Undertaker's music begins, and out comes the dead man himself Undertaker! Mr. McMahon may need some help. Oopps! A huge choke slam from hell lands the chairman on his face in the ring. The lights go out and Undertaker is gone, but replaced by Stone Cold Steve Austin. Of course Austin has something to say about it. (WHAT?) Austin offers a beer to Mr. McMahon. Austin lays down right next to Mr. McMahon but it isn't working out too well to drink laying down. Two more beers are thrown in for celebratory purposes. Mr. McMahon looks ill. Stone cold gets tired of waiting so he delivers a very deliberate Stunner to the Chairman and it's just like old times!
Congratulations WWE for 15 years of the most entertaining programming in the history of entertainment! We love you!
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